Well courtesy to the “Bharat
bandh” called by the political parties I when woke up today as per my usual
schedule and was about to leave for office I realized that it has been declared
as non working day in the office. After a few minutes of hustle and bustle to
inform my team and ensuring they got the message as well I settled on couch and
spend some time on the FB and other social activities online. Once the feeling subs-sided
then I realized / discovered couple of things about myself:-
- I’m a coffee person now and need my morning mocha to become any kind of functional unit in the morning. I did had habit of having a morning coffee once I reach office but never realized that this ritual has slowly creeped in to my mandatory “to-do” list, there I go as if current addition list was not sufficient enough…. :(
- It has been a really long-long time since I have woken up early w/o an agenda and I was left wondering post morning hustle – bustle – what to do with all this morning time…..? This I felt a bit too weird considering I’m at my home, in my own den and still feeling lost somehow. Slowly it made me realize it does not matter where we are and what we do gradually we become mechanized instruments following our regular schedules and activities (at least for the week days) – and any sudden changes throws mind off the track, especially when there is no event which requires an immediate reaction from us.
Anyways after suffering the blabbering
of the multiple news channel where anchor’s tends to repeat the same news over
and over and over for some time, I had my breakfast; plugged in my playlist and
started reading the novel (The Lady Chatterley’s Lover by D H Lawrence). Around
20 minutes later somewhere around the page 50 – 55 in the novel I landed on the
conversation talking about the “touch”. The conversation revolved around how humans
have become immune to touch. “Touch” in the this context done not mean a
physical contact but touching some one’s soul…..I totally agree here - Yes we
indeed get in touch with many during our lives but rarely get in to “touch”
with some!!!! This triggered stupid wandering
mind of mine in to a small journey - cruising through multiple thoughts; and I
landed up putting the book aside and working on this note.
Anyways going back to the thought
process – I had two streams of thoughts:-
- I feel may be we are a bit too much scared now a days of getting hurt to let anyone near to our soul. We build big strong walls of ignorance, ego, pride, materials to ensure minimal breach and keeping our true self far and secure from the reach of others. Most of us will not accept or realize it but when we stand in front of the mirror, ask this questions looking deep in to our eyes we will realize – “This is more of less true!!!!” Now the question which comes to my mind is – “By building these walls are we really protecting our self or are we really enslaving our self???”….. had to remember when you bolt a door in a room – no one from outside can come inside but at the same time you cannot go outside as well…..
- Well I feel in this specific matter we are the victims and the culprits both… We do not allow other to touch our souls and at the same time we do not try (in fact avoid) to touch others as well….now the question I’m asking myself is – “Why? Is it that bad..? Why are we afraid to reach out to others…..? Is it because we do NOT want to or is it because we are scared…..?” I do not think it is an issue of the willingness but feel it is more about the fear…. Fear because there is no one way traffic here… when one tries to touch some first he / she has to lower his / her guard, one can not touch a life without being touched by it…. Like a window or a door – once opened it is always a two way traffic…..
On parting notes somehow this reminds me of the days (around 12+
years back) when I had recently passed out of college and had a big big fight
with one of my closest friend…. At that time we had our difference and when I
told my friend that all is over he / she fought with me, not because of the
disagreements but because he / she was not willing to let the things end
between us and was willing to fight for it…. This person was a very easy to go
kind of person who believed in going
with the flow, enjoying life, did not believed in calling back and letting the time
takes it due course. The message I received at that point was “take the timeout
if you want but don’t dare you call it quits, else I will make sure to beat the
hell out of you….” today when we are still good friends and 12 years have
passed; when I look back in time – “I’m neither thankful for the company, nor
for the friendship or support but I’m thankful to my friend only and only for
one thing – "For that fight!!!; for
fighting with me while fighting for us when the chips were down…."
~lokesh v. (XXX)
~lokesh v. (XXX)
